The word “Love” has always been in existence right from when the world existed and ever since, there hasn’t really been a perfect definition for it as it could mean different things to different people. Love is patient, kind and compassionate, it’s not selfish and finds no fault says the “Holy Bible”. The dictionary also defined love as a profound and caring affection towards someone or a feeling of intense attraction towards someone. Love, for me is very objective and it is more of giving than taking, like the popular saying “you can’t give what you don’t have”, meaning you have to love yourself genuinely before you can love someone else. The quality of your love life is a reflection on how much you love and care for yourself.
Is love hard to find? Well in my own opinion, I would say no, I totally believe that love is everywhere, its right within us. I personally think that the society has made us believe that love is hard due to certain events that keep happening. I remember sometimes ago, I was having a conversation with an aunt of mine about relationships, because she just had a break up at that time, she was telling me that she doesn’t know why it’s so difficult for her to find someone who would love her truly, she kept on going on and on about it and I was just there wondering to myself why would someone as good as she is can’t just get someone to love her right. This conversation I had with her changed my thoughts about love but the truth is it’s not always the same with everyone. The fact that someone isn’t getting the love they want or desire at a particular time doesn’t me it’s going to be the same for others or they won’t eventually do. Sometimes, the reason why some people don’t find love is because they are yet to discover love within themselves, the importance of self-love really can’t be overemphasize, giving it a second thought to this my aunt’s situation, I couldn’t help but think that maybe if she loved herself enough and the love was radiating through her, she would have found the love she desired. Fast word to last month when she got married, everyone just kept on saying that “finally she’s getting married” and stuffs like that, I wasn’t even surprised that people were passing such comments because it’s just the way the society has made us, like any lady who isn’t married at a particular age, is already overdue and has nothing to offer. I was honestly happy for her and I learnt a lot from her experience. Love is not hard to find, sometimes it’s just the timing, all we need is patience but the society just has a way of putting pressure on us especially on matters concerning marriage. Love is not a child’s play and isn’t something that is meant to be compromised. It also happens that most people do search for love in wrong places and they keep going on with it thinking they would arrive somewhere in the end even when the love they are searching for is just right beside them. Some people would choose a partner who doesn’t love them the right way over a partner that is ready to love them truly, it breaks my heart when I see people settle for the love they have rather than the love they truly deserve.
Some people also think love is hard to find because all they have known is heartbreak, disappointment, and rejection. For someone who has gone through all of these, how is he or she supposed to radiate love because they have no idea what it feels like to be loved? We all need to learn to show more love and affection to each other and that way the society would be a better place. Why go into a relationship with someone you do not love in the first place?, what’s the need to hurt someone when you can love them? We as human need to do better! We have to learn how to deal with our past emotions and deal with how we grieve our losses. A lot of people build up walls against their emotions as a way of avoiding the hurts and pain they had from their past relationships to repeat itself again not knowing that they are hurting themselves the more. I remember the time I had a really bad break up, I would literally cry myself to sleep every night until one day I told myself enough was enough and I made up my mind I wasn’t going to let anyone hurt me anymore. After that, a few other relationships I had didn’t work because I had already built this wall in my heart and as a result there was no love or let me say the love was one-sided because I had already made up my mind that I wasn’t going trust anyone to avoid the hurt and pain I had gone through in my previous relationship. This lasted for a while as the relationships just weren’t working out because I was taking out the hurt I had experienced on the relationship and my partner, even though I tried to make it work. After this I decided to take a break from dating and just stay single to rediscover myself because I just felt like I had lost myself in the process of grieving. It took a while but m glad I took that break because I was able to discover who I really am and what I wanted for myself.
No matter hard or how long finding love may seem, there is hope that we would in the end. Sometimes all its takes is a little effort, we have to learn to put ourselves out there and choose to love and to be loved again, no effort is too small when it comes to getting what your heart desires. In order to find the love that you desire, you have to erase that thought that love is hard to find, be happy with yourself, show love to people and true love would find you. Love is everywhere, although there might be some occasional disappointments, they happen just for you to figure out what’s or who is good for you and who isn’t but in the end it would be worth it. To anyone going through any form heart-break or rejection, I hope that you find the strength and solitude to get pass whatever it is you are going through.