Paralyzed

I stand in front of the mirror
glaring at what I see.
Clouded
besmirched
demons all 
giggling at me.
Tearing my soul
my heart
my dreams.
Shredding with ruthless disregard
no matter how I plead.
I lay myself bare
only to be turned away.
I lay myself open 
my veins sobbing.
Turn blind eyes
unable to see
impotent 
to pierce the fog surrounding me.
How do you love? 
Let us count the way.
You do not.
Can I walk away? 
Can I say good bye?
To you?
To the fantasy?
I stand
voice frozen 
watching
as you turn to leave
sauntering
no regard
never looking back.
Dejected
eyes sad 
tears unshed 
never falling on my cheeks.
I know that you won’t touch me.
You don’t even see.
I know you don’t understand me.
You pretend all is fine.
While I…..
shatter beneath the blows.
 
©July 14/19
Picture via Pinterest

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