Hey, you’ll how was your weekend? I had the best Mother’s Day in 16 years, why? because it was the first of many mother’s days with MY DAVID and my daughter. My daughter works the weekends normally and on this past Saturday she participated in a dance-a-thon at her high school to raise money for the Monroe Carroll Children’s Hospital, I was excited and proud of her for wanting to help children who are sick just as she was as a child so David and I made it a family outing having no qualms about driving an hour in order to make it happen BUT my child’s father lives closer to the school than I do and yet I’m the one who’s driving an hour FOR HER!!!

She asked her dad if he would take her but he refused so of course it was up to me to pick up the slack as I’ve done so many times before. He’s been trippin’ ever since he found out My David is in my life, I actually introduced them a few weeks back just to be respectful and to keep the peace because unlike him I wasn’t given the opportunity to be introduced to his wife, he left us to be with her then thrust her into mine and my child’s face in a matter of a couple weeks. He didn’t care how we felt about her, I didn’t trust her either but I knew I had no say so over who he marries just as long as she doesn’t hurt my child. Unfortunately, that’s never been the case, she’s mistreated my daughter from day ONE!!!

She has always HATED MY GUTTS, she blames me for her husband’s cheating ways and the fact that I got pregnant made it worse so when my ex won custody I’m sure she was happy and laughing at me thinking that she was getting retribution from the past but one the other hand once the honeymoon was over I’m sure she had time to THINK about what THEY JUST GOT THEMSELVES INTO BY WINNING CUSTODY OF A 5-YEAR-OLD when they’re both past 50 at the time. She’s sickly all the time and my ex is a lying con artist workaholic who had no business getting custody from me the younger of the bunch. She thought they were hurting me BUT THEY WERE HURTING MY CHILD AND THEMSELVES EVEN WORSE because the court has now placed ME the FATHER ROLE and my ex in my role as her mother he now get to help with homework and all the things mothers get to do daily and I’m left in the cold unless something happens which require me punishing her and my paying him child support (although he makes 4 times what I make driving tanker trucks), I STILL PAY HIM SUPPORT!

Both he and his wife have mistreated my child over the last 16 years, verbally, mentally, physically, emotionally, and psychologically by calling her dumb, stupid, nasty, b—h and any other word you can imagine to her face as well as calling me the same names to her face in the midst of 8 kids younger than she who tease her and mimic what they hear my ex and his wife says. It puts me in a bad position because I can’t let on that I know because he will punish her for telling me by limiting our contact by phone and visits, he has violated the court order and kept her from me during Thanksgiving through New Year 2015 because he was mad when I scolded him for mistreating her and the court let him get away with it, they did nothing to him but sent ME to jail for being behind child support (how backward is that?)

From the time her father met My David at the pickup/drop off spot he’s been questioning my daughter about him and since I know him well I told my child to say I don’t know we don’t discuss him (My David) so she won’t get caught up in drama or a lie. He told her he doesn’t trust David after he dropped her off to him for me one Friday because I worked late and although he waved at David (FAKE) he’s still drinkin’ straight HATER-AID FOR NO REASON!! He makes snide remarks about David both he and his wife plus her oldest child who tried to befriend me but I didn’t FALL FOR HER OKEY DOKE she’s sneaky and a liar too with sarcasm and laughter all in the middle of the HATE. I’ve dealt with their mouth on me for the last 16 years, I pray for them often because they need JESUS but now that David is in the picture I now must deal with their mouth on him and I KNOW THAT WON’T BE EASY.

David has stepped up and treated my daughter with love and respect since we became engaged, she and I have talked about what she thinks of he and I, what she thinks of him in general, and how he’s treated her. Thank God she loves him because he reminds her of her dad physically, they favor in a lot of ways. She asked David to teach her how to drive and for money for shopping with friends and he gave it up with no hesitation. He asked for my permission to take her out on a daddy/daughter date, I agreed because I feel it’s never too late for her to learn how to be treated like a young lady from her father figure and since her dad has FAILED IN THAT AREA David is now willing to step in and step up so I’m thankful to God for sending this wonderful man to US! I’m glad I stood still long enough for the Lord to send him to my door, I had to work on myself the whole time so that I can be the best wife I can be for my husband God has for me, I’m still working on myself, actually we’re working on our issues together we are determined to make God proud of us by blessing our marriage before it happens AND GUESS WHAT YA’LL?

WE’RE STILL NOT HAVING SEX!! We are so proud of ourselves, it’s been close to 90 days, it’s been easy at times but for the most part it has been MESSIN’ WITH ME, I know I must be strong and stand firm on my convictions, with me being a sexaholic from my past abuses it’s important for me to be able to control my urges for not only my sake but for my daughter’s as well because I MUST set a positive example for her so that she won’t make my mistakes in her future. We must break the cycle of dysfunction in our families and it starts with a MOTHER WHO’S MENTALLY, EMOTIONALLY, AND SPIRITUALLY HEALTHY enough to make it happen and break the chain of bad choices, and abuse. I’m determined to be spiritually healthy for my child and husband, I’m excited for our future God is blessing our effort to not fornicate in many ways especially financially, He’s just a truly awesome God.

I will continue to pray for my ex and his wife, I REFUSE TO DRINK THEIR HATER-AID, it doesn’t look good, it doesn’t feel good, and it doesn’t act good! Life is too funny to be silly, prayer and Jesus are the ones who can help them to not be EVIL and begin to practice the love of Christ towards me and my fiancé. I believe in forgiveness even when I’m not feelin’ it, if I want forgiveness I must give forgiveness, father God in the name of Jesus, I pray for those with bitterness and anger in their hearts, those with unforgiveness and malice in their hearts, help them to practice the love of Christ that He spoke of during His entire earthly ministry. He is the PERFECT EXAMPLE OF LOVE, thank you for My David and for his patience and ability to not react to my ex and his nonsense, thank you for being the awesome God you are through your love for me and others, help me to show the love of Christ more each day to your standard and not the world’s standard, in Jesus name I pray Amen. BE BLESSED ALL DAY EVERY DAY



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