Written By Ishita Dey

“Why was it necessary for you to tell the world that you are gay?” This question was on everybody’s mind when Ellen DeGeneres revealed her sexual identity in the ‘90s. And she answered, “Because it is OK.” This small yet powerful statement was enough to tell the world that it is not an abnormality or a disease which we should get rid of.

I still can’t figure out why I support the LGBT community. It wasn’t common where I lived. India is a place where even inter-caste as well as inter-religion marriages are hardly accepted. So for people to accept gay marriage can be beyond imagination. But still love finds its paradise. Today, many people openly accept their identity while some other still struggle for existence.

I was told to forget about them and was asked many times: “What makes you support ‘such’ people?” “Do you belong to that community as well?” I was even asked some nasty questions like, “How do they even have sex?” Well, that’s none of your heterosexual business. I just don’t understand why people are judged by their sexual preferences.


Few days ago, the world celebrated Valentine’s Day. It makes me recall an incident which happened a year ago on the same day. I saw many couples engaged in PDA but then I saw a couple which was different from the others. I could tell they were in love but perhaps they were scared to show it openly. I asked them and at first they hesitated, but I guess I made them comfortable enough to speak out. They were gay/lesbian? and in a live-in relationship for the past ten years and had been abandoned by their families for “not being normal.” I asked them whether they wanted to get married and I got one of the most beautiful replies I have ever heard, “Marriage is just a piece of paper and our relationship goes beyond that. We don’t want our relationship to be infested by the homophobic eyes of the society.” Well, then there’s also the legal hurdle.

We as a society need to understand, and realise, that they just need to be left alone and that they can be happy with each other too. They are not a burden on anyone. Like any other demographic, they don’t need to prove themselves. For, like any other demographic, they have already done so – Alan Turing, Ellen Page, Harvey Milk, the list goes on. Yes, the times are changing. And as we move ahead, we have to leave our baggage behind. And we certainly can’t move ahead with ‘Terms and conditions applied.’